Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Morning Session 002

My room is messy when I woke up. Well, it’s a sign that I don’t get laid lately. Is it good? I dunno. This morning is gloomy. The sun is nowhere to be found – it is hiding, or maybe it is hidden beneath the clouds that is about to break loose of the rain. Like my mood this morning, it is gloomy. The blissful me have been covered with my problems in Mathematics. I have this feeling that I’m not going to finish college because of that subject. It’s just that I can’t get it on my head like any other subjects that I have.
But then, there are other students in my batch who also can’t pass mathematics. In fact, it’s already their 3rd take and still they find it difficult. And they are okay with it. So why should I not be okay? There’s no enough reason for this mood swing, right?

Also, I felt betrayed by a friend. Not a big deal but the fact that she was able to spill my secrets somehow ruined my trust for her. And yes, it hurts because I trusted her.

Another thing that I think I should write about is this girl that I love for almost 2 years now. Will we ever be? I guess no. Maybe it is best if I leave everything to time; not expect something from it, and in fact not even think about it.

Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Morning Session 001

The sunlight passing through my windows which extends to my bed woke me up like the usual morning I had since we transferred here in Bugo, Cagayan de Oro City. My room is a dead witness on how emotionally volatile I was the past mornings, and it has become my static consoler – the paintings, although they’re not really paintings, reminds me of how sunny I used to be. What I actually mean is that from socially “outrageous”, I have become to a great extent socially withdrawn. The shift actually is nothing that I can call easy, it comes from experience, in which, as far as I know, far beyond my control.

I am not saying that something negative happened. Being socially withdrawn is not negative. In fact, my greatest realizations came about during solitude – the times when there’s nothing else to think of but myself, how I am feeling, and how to deal with my emotions. In other words it brought me to know deeply who I am.

I think that would be all this morning. And BTW this is part of my writing training. And yes, I am taking my friends advice to pursue learning German language. Adios!

Saturday, January 29, 2011

Love in the time of defiance

Source: http://www.stanford.edu

It was Friday at 3:45 PM, the weather and the sky alike were repulsive as Lean, a 3rd year Psychology student, tried to widen his lip sideward to manufacture a smile, and hid the hostility the world had brought him since the day began. He was passing XU’s Social Science (SS) building, the street was empty the way he sees it, and the trees within his sight are moving gently as the cold wind blow their leaves off. Pulled by gravity, every leaf glides into the cold air presenting a sad epic scene.

“Beautiful, isn’t it?” He asked himself as he remembered something that gave him a chill - the memories of an old friendship, a love affair that could have lasted although bittersweet, but had lost its way into the oblivion of nothingness. As the lineaments of a girl occupied his thoughts, the world around him began to lose meaning. He recalled her name without constraints, it was Dibay. The name was two Filipino words patched together - “Digma” and “Bayan” or “Digmang Bayan.”

Their story began nothing like the normal gorgeous-prince-saves-the-helpless-cinderella we usually see in movies, and so as their relationship. They both started with fire, not with their feelings though but with their undying defiance against tyranny and injustices, against the widespread poverty and inequality, and against state terrorism as a normal requite of a government that is afraid of the people’s clamor claiming for what is rightfully theirs in the parliamentary of the street. In other words, both of them were activists, they share the same political views that brought about their basis of unity that had soon become one of the cornerstones of their relationship. And they met in the streets where a poor man’s justice could be found.

Dibay and Lean are best friends since they set foot in MSU-IIT. For almost two years they managed to mix activism, schooling, heavy drinking, and any other activities a youth would want to do but didn’t because of parental supervision. Their case was different. They are like free birds that had been caged for 18 years in places called house and school.

One day, Lean is nowhere to be found in a march-rally against the commercialization of the Philippine Educational System. That rally has had a direct hit to them since they are state university students, or what they called iskolar ng bayan. As it was about to start; almost 300 students started afoot from the street fronting MSU-IIT to Iligan City’s post office – the place where peaceful demonstrators usually set their rendezvous.

Dibay was one of the protestors, alone, wondering where Lean could be. As the march advanced, she keeps on wandering around and scanning every face her eyesight could permit but her boy could not be found. As the fervor of the youth-activists’ escalate, the airwaves in where the protest is nearing were conquered by their battle cry. Dusts turned to smog as it rose from the ground fogging the streets where they passed. Soaked with sweat, she found herself a good place in the picket line where she could have a chance to see the whole of the demonstration. She was then hoping to find Lean. Her dress stick to her skin making her body-shape visibly detailed from the outside. Although it wasn’t sexy but sure it was beautiful enough to catch the attention of a guy named Sander.

On the other hand, Lean was busy searching for a flower shop. Specifically, he is looking for a while tulip that made him circle around the city, delaying his participation on the protest. That day, for him, isn’t just about fighting for student’s rights. Aside from it was their first anniversary as lovers, it was also the third-year anniversary of their never ceasing friendship. Also, as their “rule of the thumb,” every rally is considered as a date. And Lean, with a sure feeling of love, never failed to bring something surprising every anniversary that they had. (to be continued...)